- When you care for someone so much, you sincerely believe none of their actions are done with the intent to hurt you.
- When you care for someone so much, you find yourself oversensitive to every decision they make.
- When you find yourself believing the story told between the two of you couldn’t possibly end in anything other than “happily ever after”.
- When they can’t seem to stop crossing your mind over and over, perhaps leaving you frustrated by how often they appear.
- An infatuation, perhaps a physical obsession, a mental addiction, or some other overwhelming attraction to another person.
- That “fa la la” mental fog of hazy and blissful euphoria caused by another person, where you can’t help but smile and hum while cartoon bluebirds alight upon your finger to sing you a tune.
- A care you feel for another person that is gently protective, warmly nurturing, intimately affectionate, and compassionately respectful.
- The idea of having sex with someone else could never happen. The thought might cross your mind or try to tempt you (this is normal), but to actually go through with it is an entirely different story.
- When everything they do is just sooooooo cuuuuuute.
- When they can send you into fits of uncontrollable giggles or leave you breathless from full-bodied laughter.
In the few minutes it took to type out that list, struggling over various concepts of what it might mean to be in love, I realized:
Trying to define something ruins the beauty of some things. Trying to discern exactly what something is and study it like a specimen — it takes away from just how wonderful that something can be.
I’ve never been a fan of labels. Words, I adore, but this idea of attaching a word or set of words to an idea so intangible as love which, depending on who you ask, can have any number of meanings and seems to be different for every person, not to mention every set of relationships that person has — the thought is too taxing for “love”.
Love isn’t a science, is it? Is it too romantic to believe in and still hope for a sort of rapturous love that exists only in fairy tales and cinematic dreams?
I think some of us get so caught up in the technicalities of how something should feel or be that we forget to simply enjoy the moment. What’s the rush, I ask you? Why pummel headfirst into something we don’t understand and can’t even define, armed only with our high expectations?
If there ever comes a point in your life where you need to stop and ask yourself if you’re in love, do yourself a favor and rethink your strategy. You are walking down the wrong path. Don’t get lost in that weird self-reflective headspace that only summons worry or stress in return. Shake yourself, take a deep breath, then look at your situation again from a more peaceful perspective aimed at enhancing your life. All we want is to be happy, right?
Ask yourself, “How do I feel when I’m around this person?” And, “Does this feel good?” Try not to think about how anyone else feels about your relationship. Be emotionally intelligent and self aware; understand you. At the end of the day, you are in charge of your life and you get to decide on the experiences you want to have.
Above all, retain your sense of independence.
Never forget about who you are, and who you want to be.
Don’t let love rule you.
Remind yourself often of what makes you you, and love that person first.
Come discuss this with me on Facebook.